Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize