I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
