either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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