Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize