im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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