Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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