Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid

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(757): View more from Virginia

this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial

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(609): View more from New Jersey

my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.

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(443): View more from Maryland

I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.

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These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE

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(940): View more from Texas

I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.

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(469): View more from Texas

On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.

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(727): View more from Florida

Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow

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