woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
