I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
