I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
