He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
