so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
So squirting runs in the family.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize