Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
