At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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