My girlfriend figured out who you are.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
