Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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