u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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