JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize