Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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