sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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