So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
