you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize
