Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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