In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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