How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
