Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
it was like eating out sand paper
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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