i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
