id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
