Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize
