Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
vagina is talking i cant
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
