So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize