I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize