i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Terrible idea I love it
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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