If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
