I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize