he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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