I wanna bring you to show and tell
Plan B is the new Plan A
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
