he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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