so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
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if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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