So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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