I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
