Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
accomplished twins. life is a go
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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