I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
We need to rekindle our bromance
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize