you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
