Sry I called you an 8
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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