Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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