Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
