Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
