just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
