The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
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